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  •  
    Author Message

    BadIan

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    358 posts

    Location: Ethiopia
    Occupation: Street vendor
    Age:

    #186284   2008-05-20 14:44 GMT      
    FADED SATIN

    I watch you,
    still sleeping,
    whispers of the dark
    embrace you.

    So pure
    and gentle,
    you hold the world
    in a kiss.

    Quiescent,
    mesmerizing,
    with a voice
    that breaks night.

    I watch you,
    still sleeping.
    You will never sing
    again.

    StrangerHere

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    390 posts

    Location: Pitcairn
    Occupation: Footballer
    Age:

    #186285   2008-05-20 14:51 GMT      
    Yeah I can see why it got deleted. It really sucks.

    Hickory dickory dock... oh, nevermind.

    Power2Frogs

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    350 posts

    Location: Algeria
    Occupation: CEO
    Age:

    #186286   2008-05-20 14:52 GMT      
    thats really deep.
    i like it.

    pandatome

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    408 posts

    Location: North Korea
    Occupation: Upholsterer
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    #186287   2008-05-20 15:04 GMT      
    I like this poem. Did the person die? I mean is that the idea? I like it good job!

    DewDrop

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    365 posts

    Location: Wales
    Occupation: CEO
    Age:

    #186288   2008-05-20 15:14 GMT      
    I cannot for the life of me understand why they had deleted you beautiful poem.Unless it is the tones of necrophilia that worked contains.

    Grimmy

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    350 posts

    Location: Venezuela
    Occupation: Restaurateur
    Age:

    #186289   2008-05-20 15:17 GMT      
    very interesting.

    Minnie

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    383 posts

    Location: Canada
    Occupation: Proctologist
    Age:

    #186290   2008-05-20 15:29 GMT      
    The poem is beautiful!
    It's only my opinion, but I would make the last line a happy one.

    Ladybug

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    363 posts

    Location: Nauru
    Occupation: Bacteriologist
    Age:

    #186291   2008-05-20 15:29 GMT      
    Honestly, I love it. Especially that last part "I watch you, still sleeping. You will never sing again."
    Wonderful work.

    PunkRocker

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    376 posts

    Location: Micronesia
    Occupation: Contract Manager
    Age:

    #186292   2008-05-20 15:32 GMT      
    Shall I sing for you
    a lullaby.
    A song so very sweet.
    One that puts your mind to rest
    And gives
    Eternal sleep.

    Justkeepswimming

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    388 posts

    Location: Sudan
    Occupation: Lawyer
    Age:

    #186293   2008-05-20 15:33 GMT      
    Super! You are really gaining strength as a poet.

    FallingMoon

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    405 posts

    Location: Uruguay
    Occupation: Herder
    Age:

    #186294   2008-05-20 15:46 GMT      
    I will never understand them. The imagery is intense. I like this poem very much.

    Tuskey

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    371 posts

    Location: Grenada
    Occupation: Fluffer
    Age:

    #186295   2008-05-20 15:47 GMT      
    "So pure
    and gentle,
    you hold the world
    in a kiss."

    TangerineLeaves

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    401 posts

    Location: Pakistan
    Occupation: Presenter
    Age:

    #186296   2008-05-20 16:07 GMT      
    this is kinda creepy..in a sweet way...how is that possible?...

    LoneWolf

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    354 posts

    Location: Sweden
    Occupation: Archer
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    #186297   2008-05-20 17:11 GMT      
    Very interesting and darkly beautiful. It could be a person in a coma, or dying that you speak to, or it could be that you are leaving this person behind and their sorrow will be complete. I cannot understand why this was deleted at all. It has a "voice that breaks night". Thank you.

    RacerX

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    342 posts

    Location: Canada
    Occupation: Civil servant
    Age:

    #186298   2008-05-20 17:13 GMT      
    You are on fire today.

    Tryyourluck

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    377 posts

    Location: Finland
    Occupation: Fashion designer
    Age:

    #186299   2008-05-20 18:02 GMT      
    Beautiful, and profound beyond words.

    oddperson

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    345 posts

    Location: Sweden
    Occupation: Accountant
    Age:

    #186300   2008-05-20 18:25 GMT      
    I sleep
    While you watch
    the nightmare fades
    with your whispered lullaby
    So that I can sleep longer
    will you sing to me forever?

    Salinger

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    400 posts

    Location: Uzbekistan
    Occupation: Seamstress
    Age:

    #186301   2008-05-20 19:13 GMT      
    COOL BEANS! I likey when they make mention of strange things. i do not care that the name has little visual meaning to the poem, it works! And have you ever tried getting beans out of satin? Not easy!... not that i wear any satin apparel.

    TheBirdWatcher

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    341 posts

    Location: Monaco
    Occupation: Bodyguard
    Age:

    #186302   2008-05-21 12:03 GMT      
    the smooth covers invite me to sleep
    but waking sleeplessness they taunt.
    > 1 <